The removal van pulled up on Cherry Tree drive and Rylan ran out.

“Where have you been?” Rylan shouted to the van driver as he climbed down from the cab.

“Sorry mate. I took the wrong turn at Dartford tunnel.”

The driver walked around to the back of the van and opened up the door.

“Hello, luv!”

Rylan looked around but couldn’t see anyone there.

“It’s only me. Cilla ‘ere!”

Suddenly, a head popped up from behind a bay tree.

“Oh my God. You’re Cilla Black!”

“You alright, chuck?”

“I’m alright, but I think your bush needs a trim,” Rylan grinned as Cilla continued hacking away.

“Welcome to the street. I think it would be lovely for you to meet some of the others.”

“Others?” Rylan’s smile dropped and he looked confused. “What others?”

“People like us.”

“Us? What, like utterly fabulous celebrities you mean?” Rylan replied.

“I mean ….” Cilla was interrupted by the telephone ringing. “I have to go, but I can get the gang together later.” Cilla ran into the house shouting “We’ll be around at 8!”

Rylan sighed and walked away.

After making sure most of his dining room furniture was correctly placed, the doorbell chimed and Rylan looked at the clock; it was 8.00pm.

Opening the door, he was greeted by Cilla Black who held a bottle of champagne in each hand. She moved to the side to make way for a line of people who proceeded to march into the hallway. One by one, Rylan recognised some of the faces as they walked in carrying gifts and nodding a quick hello to as they passed.

Rylan smiled a wide-toothed grin as Freddie Mercury, Esther Rantzen, Shane McGowan and Janet Street-Porter shuffled into the house.

Cilla was the last in and turned to Rylan as she handed him the champagne. “We’re gonna have a lorra, lorra laughs chuck!”

Rylan couldn’t stop smiling. Had he finally found a place where he really belonged with like-minded people?

The night was going amazingly well as Rylan chatted to Janet about Celebrity Jungle and Freddie told him all about how Brian May slept with curlers in his hair everything … it was great!

The doorbell chimed and Esther pulled the curtain aside and peeked to see who was at the door.

“Oh no, don’t answer!” she sounded very worried.

“Don’t be daft,” Rylan walked towards the front door.

Shane stood behind Esther and moved the curtain aside to see who was outside.

“Rylan, don’t!” he slurred, in between knocking back his bottle of gin.

“We thought we’d got rid of him as he NEVER fitted in and never will,” said Esther.

Rylan waved his hand to dismiss their comments and opened the door. He gazed open mouthed at the wooden boy with the long, pointy nose.

“Pinocchio!” Rylan turned to look as Shane, Esther, Janet and Freddie shock their heads.

The group shouted out in unison, “You’re in the wrong club!”

Pinocchio turned and dropped his shoulder as he sadly walked away.