by Jenny

Stan: 47, 5’7”

Bus driver, GSOH

Seeks companion for long walks, cosy nights and maybe more…?

Stan was pleased with that. Resting his arms on the steering wheel he hit ‘Update’ and put his phone in his pocket.

“Morning Stan”

“Morning Mary - single to town?”


Mary struggled up the bus steps heavily, leaning on Stan’s booth to catch her breath between the gaps in her teeth.

“How’s them Tinders going, Stan? Any girlies yet?”

“Not yet Mary - none of them reach my exacting standards, see.”

“Aye” said Mary, eyeing Stan’s paunch, baggy eyes and skin like the outside of an avocado round his neck and chin. “That’ll be it. Well, never say die.”

Mary was almost part of the bus itself, she rode it so often. She was full of dating advice for Stan, which he rarely asked for. She lurched towards her place near the front and they set off.

As Stan pulled into the bus station he felt a buzz in his pocket. The Tinders! He forced himself to wait until all the passengers had left before checking:

Angel666: Hi Stan. I like long walks too. Intrigued by ‘maybe more…’ What did you have in mind? ;)

Stan’s heart felt lighter than air. He tapped a thick-fingered response:

Stan: Oh, this and that - bet you have some ideas, Angel?

Almost instantaneously his phone buzzed a reply

Angel666: I could show you a thing or two...Angel by name, NOT by nature!

Stan couldn’t believe his luck. Months of silence and now this! He swiped clumsily at his phone to find out what she looked like, but her avatar was just a photo of a plastic angel with tiny devil horns. A woman of mystery; he liked that.

That day Stan’s mind raced as fast as his bus. He and Angel typed frantically to each other, each response racier than the last. Stan’s collar grew damp; his trousers uncomfortable.

Around midday a slender blonde climbed aboard. Stan hadn’t seen her before and she looked at him seductively through long lashes, lingering over her change. She brandished a pink phone, which, to Stan’s astonishment, had a sexy cartoon angel on it. She practically showed it to him! He swallowed and watched her swaying backside walking up the aisle.

“Hiya Stan”

“Hello Mary. I’ve had a bite on them Tinders - a tasty bite as it happens” then mouthing ‘she’s here!’ and gesturing oafishly over his shoulder.

Mary stared at the blonde then grabbed Stan’s phone, scrolling greedily.

“Filthy bugger aren’t you? I hope she knows what she’s getting into!”

“What’s getting into her more like” leered Stan. Mary cackled obligingly.

As Mary hobbled to her seat Stan watched the blonde tapping at her phone. Seconds later Stan’s buzzed:

Angel666: I can see you, Stan. Can’t wait till you’re driving this big bus - bet you love being in control…

Blushing Stan fired up the engine, not noticing the little plastic charm dangling innocently from Mary’s phone, tiny horns glinting in the sunlight...